Have you ever felt like you’re running the same script over and over—only to realise the whole world is stuck in the same loop? Like some cosmic version of Groundhog Day, but without Bill Murray’s charm?
Lately, I feel like I’m “coming out” again and again—not in the traditional sense, but in a way that feels just as profound. Maybe it’s something in the water (seriously, has anyone checked?), or maybe it’s the result of years of deep diving—both personally and professionally—into the patterns that keep us stuck. And the more I notice them in myself, the more I see them reflected in the very systems designed to support us—government, health, education to name a few.
Through my work in these spaces, I’ve developed a deep understanding of addiction, subconscious patterning, and societal influences. And here’s the kicker: the very patterns that keep individuals trapped are the same ones holding our institutions—and our collective mindset—hostage in cycles of dysfunction.
Let’s unpack this together.
The Awakening: Noticing the Patterns
Most of us live on autopilot, running subconscious scripts, we picked up long ago. These patterns shape how we see the world, how we think, and ultimately, how we act. Some serve us well—like brushing our teeth every morning (unless you’re aiming for a truly avant-garde approach to personal hygiene). But human nature craves familiarity, and sometimes, we sabotage ourselves by clinging to patterns that no longer serve us, simply because they feel comfortable.
Breaking the Loop
Breaking free requires disrupting the pattern—like hitting a mental "Control-Alt-Delete." We have to consciously challenge our thoughts, beliefs, and behaviours and replace them with something better. And let’s be honest: most of us don’t do this unless life gives us a good shove up the butt.
For me, quitting alcohol was that shove.
Drinking wasn’t the problem—it was a symptom. The real issue? A deep conflict between who I thought I needed to be and who I was. Conditioned to be the “good girl”—successful career, marriage, kids, white picket fence, a dog and a cat—I internalised the belief that something was wrong with me for not fitting the mould. Alcohol numbed the discomfort, overworking kept me distracted, and relationships filled the void.
But when I finally let go of external expectations and relaxed into being ME, the need to numb started to fade.
Societal Conditioning
This is how societal conditioning can fuel addiction. When we’re pressured to be something we’re not, we seek ways to escape the dissonance—through alcohol, food, work, shopping, social media. But here’s the thing: when we recognise the patterns, challenge the conditioning, and let go of self-judgment, we create space to meet our true selves. And that, my friends, is where freedom begins!
Are Our Social Institutions Addicted to Problems?
Now, let’s zoom out from individuals to institutions.
I believe it’s time to “look up” (yes, that’s a nod to Don’t Look Up—watch it if you haven’t). There’s an undercurrent in our collective mindset—one that quietly and unconsciously influences our behaviours.
After 17 years in government and community spaces, I’ve seen the same reactionary policies and focus on what’s ‘wrong’ with our communities—like a bad soap opera where the actors change, but the script stays the same. The issues from 17 years ago are still the ones we’re tackling today, despite shifting governments and copy-paste ‘solutions.’
What if our systems are addicted to problems rather than solutions?
The Broken Record
The very institutions designed to create stability seem stuck in a pattern. A loop—churning out the same reports, identifying the same issues, and throwing money at the same symptoms, year after year. It’s like bailing water from a sinking boat instead of fixing the hole.
Take the State of the Nation report by the Salvation Army—an annual deep dive into social wellbeing. It’s cited by government agencies time and time again. And yet, the findings barely change. Child poverty, unemployment, lack of housing, crime, youth violence—same problems, same negative outcomes, same conversations—just a different date.
If addiction is defined as a repeated pattern leading to negative consequences, then are some of our institutions addicted to reinforcing failure? In the world of AA, they’d call this insanity.
“The definition of insanity is doing the same thing over and over and expecting a different result.” — AA
Is Society Addicted to Negativity?
The media is a masterclass in reinforcing negativity. Mainstream news has a pattern in place that floods us with crime, disaster, and political turmoil, with only the occasional “heartwarming” story thrown in at the end—if we’re lucky. The result? A collective perception that the world is in chaos, leaving us fearful, anxious, and distrustful.
Fear Sells
As a child of the ’80s, I was raised on horror movies—back when ratings were more like vague suggestions. Poltergeist and The Amityville Horror had me waking up in cold sweats. And guess what? My subconscious believed those fears were real. That’s how powerful repeated exposure is.
Now, apply this to the news and media. When we’re constantly fed negativity, our bodies react accordingly, reinforcing anxiety, hopelessness, and division. This isn’t just a theory—it’s fact. Take Gone in 60 Seconds. When the film was released in Canada, car theft spiked by 70% in four days. That’s how quickly repeated exposure influences behaviour.
So, if we know this, what can we do about it?
Breaking the Cycle
If these patterns exist—within us, our institutions, and our society—what’s the way out?
Awareness – Recognise the patterns in your own life and the world around you.
Disrupt the Cycle – Challenge your thoughts, habits, and behaviours to create new outcomes.
Choose Your Input Wisely – If the news makes you feel hopeless, stop watching. If social media drains you, take a break. Replace negativity with things that inspire and empower.
Take Action in Your Community – Stop waiting for institutions to fix things. Change starts where you are.
Reconnect with What’s Real – Nature, community, creativity, movement—these things ground us in truth, rather than fear-based conditioning.
Most importantly - smile, have fun, and find joy in this beautifully imperfect life. Our patterns may be a bit ridiculous at times, but they’re also part of being human. The key is to notice them, shake things up, and consciously choose something better.
Start small. Today, challenge just one thought or habit that no longer serves you. And if you’re ready to dig deeper—let’s talk.
Much love,
Bec x
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